Monday, January 25, 2010

The Green Chair Adventure

As told by Jason and Natalie Powers. Jason's story is in green italics. Be amused. :)
Once upon a time there was a man and a woman and they fell in love and got married. And we all know what happens when you get married. You decorate. The woman loved cute, pretty things and was always rearranging her house. She did this because she loved making her home a place of rest and beauty. She was much like a flower. Always adding an extra special touch to things.

The man was your average, every day, doting, loving, extremely handsome husband and father. His dashing good looks and winsome charm hid the heart of a lion... a lion who liked to know how his furniture would be arranged when he came home after a long day of hunting and keeping his flowing mane free from burrs and other such things a lion's mane is bound to pick up on the savannah.

One day the man and woman decided to go to a great furniture store....in the ghetto. It was such a lovely day. A perfect day really. Walking around the furniture store seemed so peaceful, so inspiring. The man really loved going places like this with his wife. It always pleased him to see her eyes light up when she saw a good find.

The handsome lion, content with his den's furnishings, looked forward to a mellow afternoon surveying the ghetto reaches of his Kingdom with flowery lioness and squawking cubs. Never in his wildest lion dreams could he have guessed that the furnishing enemy that waited would be from his very own pride....

While the lovely couple was shopping the woman came upon a green chair. A chair that would change everything. A chair that could possibly be the best deal she had ever seen. A chair that....she had to have. But something had gotten into the man that day. She had never seen anything like it before. He was like a lion. Not a nice lion though. He didn't want the chair. He didn't even...gasp..like it!

The lion with the beautiful mane, known throughout the kingdom as the Gentle King or the Friendly lion, on this day was subjected to something so hideous, so horrible and soul melting that it would test the very limits of his courageous heart and steely gaze... what monster could incite such knee buckling emotion from our courageous hero whose disposition was like that of a sunny spring afternoon? Only a monster ripped from decades gone by, with skin the color of neglected swimming pools and decaying flesh, threatening the home of the noble, friendly lion and his squawking cubs could do such a thing... only... a chair... a GREEN chair could drive our humble, handsome, friendly lion to call upon every reserve that lie within him.

The man always liked to use many words.

The lion was also very smart, with a mind like a steel trap and a unique way of turning a phrase.

Thankfully, the man's brother & wife were there. They loved the woman and thought everything she did in her home was wonderful. They fought for the woman, but more importantly they fought for the chair! (Hey, it was only $5.)


It didn't take long. The woman convinced him. She had a unique way of doing that. She really was that smart. She got the chair. Her home would be changed forever. People could sit on this chair. Her children one day would inherit this chair...because at this point she knew that the man would make her keep it even if she decided 5 years down the road that she wanted to toss it.....BUT it didn't matter, the green chair was hers!

The lion, ears ringing with the squawk of lion cubs and the incessant, droning roar of the lioness, was easily distracted by a large comfy couch in front of a mirror where he could both rest his weary lion bones and admire his clean, well maintained mane. Once the lion grew comfortable on the couch, and was captivated by the look of his mane, he forgot all about the lioness and her hideous green monster. His dusky light lion eyes, drooping with contented slumber soon found his home inhabited by the green monster. That day, the green skinned foe had become a trophy to the lion, an eternal sign of his ability to stare fear in the face and overcome. One thing he was certain of... this trophy would NEVER leave their happy lion home again. Ever. No matter what. It would always be there. In fact, he'd probably will it to his little lion cubs and make them tell the story anytime someone asked about it. It was that big a deal to the noble hearted lion.

The chair added so much to the happy couples home. Yes, it was just lovely. Because the man loved his wife so much, he really grew to love that chair. He would often walk by and just stare at it. Just brought tears to the woman's eyes. She loved her husband so much.....and she loved that chair.

8 comments:

Callie said...

Too funny! Who did your blog design? I desperately want to re-vamp, but I don't want to pay for it! ha!

Jennifer C said...

Hilarious...and I totally see the vision!! Great find!! :)

Anonymous said...

You two crack me up...

Unknown said...

That was hilarious! You two should tandem blog more often! :)

Phelps said...

That was so funny! I love the chair by the way! Love you guys!

Kara said...

"The woman convinced him. She had a unique way of doing that. She really was that smart."

That was the BEST part :)

Breanna said...

One of my favorites (of many!) was, "The man always liked to use many words." Ha ha ha!

Marie said...

What a hilarious and great story! I love the green chair! It was a blessing to have read your sweet comment this morning...have a great day!